Breastfeeding without pumping or giving bottles
by Cordelia Uys, NCT Breastfeeding Counsellor
March 2022
A member of NWL Breastfeeding at the hairdresser giving her son a quick feed before handing him back to her husband
As an NCT Breastfeeding Counsellor, I facilitate dozens of antenatal breastfeeding workshops every year. By far the most common question expectant parents ask is how soon they can start pumping.
I know this is because it is commonly assumed that pumping and introducing a bottle will allow a new mother some freedom and flexibility, give her a chance to get more sleep and allow the baby’s father or other parent to bond with the baby.
But pumping is not always the panacea that parents-to-be imagine. In fact, many women find expressing boring and tedious. It requires forward planning, and all the work involved with storing milk and sterilising equipment.
In addition, pumping puts women at greater risk of blocked ducts and mastitis, and there is also a risk that a baby who is given bottles may start to reject the breast.
How partners can be supportive and bond with their baby
There are many other ways that a partner can support a new mother which might be more helpful than giving a bottle, such as dealing with household chores, managing visitors, changing nappies, bathing the baby and settling him, or her, after a feed. In particular, it’s a godsend if the other parent is able to change the baby’s nappy and settle them after a nighttime feed, so the nursing mother can go straight back to sleep.
There are also numerous ways dads and partners can bond that don’t involve feeding the baby, such as doing skin to skin, having a bath with the baby, wearing the baby in a sling or baby carrier, and, above all, playing with the baby. Research shows that dads have evolved to bond with their babies through play. When playing with their children, fathers release high levels of the feel-good hormones dopamine and oxytocin:
‘From early on, dads can start building bonds through touch, hugs, skin-to-skin contact and massage. However, the biggest rushes of oxytocin come as baby grows and the relationship with dad becomes even more interactive.
“If a dad asks me ‘what’s the one thing I can do to bond with my child?’, I’ll say ‘play with them’…What’s fascinating is there’s been this coevolution between dads and babies. They both get their biggest peak of oxytocin when they play together.”’
https://www.bbc.co.uk/tiny-happy-people/science-of-fatherhood/zvnhjsg
Professor Amy Brown, one of the U.K.’s leading researchers into infant feeding, has written an article about why the idea that dads need to give a bottle to bond with their baby isn’t helpful to mothers, fathers or babies:
https://professoramybrown.co.uk/articles/f/bottle-feeding-is-not-the-only-way-to-bond-with-your-baby
Here’s what my client Yael wrote about how her husband bonded with their baby girl:
‘There’s need to express, there are so many ways partners can get special time with baby. My husband used to do skin-on-skin time with baby, cuddling and singing to her, and nappy changes when he also sang to her lots, and massaged her, and was super present, as well as time when he walked her around the house talking to her and explaining things (his 10 minute explanations of all sorts of things, for example, what stairs are, were fascinating and she enjoyed that time so much), he would “answer” all of her sounds and make it seem like it was a back and forth conversation and I loved hearing them.’
Giving a bottle at night carries risks and doesn’t tend to increase the amount of sleep a mother gets
Because of the way breastmilk production works: https://www.cordeliauys.co.uk/how-breastmilk-production-works , in the early months, if a mother goes longer than roughly 3 or 4 hours without breastfeeding or pumping, unless she has a very large breast storage capacity: https://www.instagram.com/p/CLXTEvlsZXv/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link , her breasts will get the message to reduce milk production, and she could be at risk of developing blocked ducts and mastitis. Therefore, contrary to what is commonly believed, someone else giving a bottle at night doesn’t tend to mean mothers get more sleep because most mothers would need to wake up and pump at some point close to when their baby needs to feed.
N.B. Contrary to popular belief, giving a bottle of formula at night doesn’t make babies sleep longer:
And there can be an impact on a mother’s milk supply and the baby’s health when formula is given:
https://breastfeeding.support/supplementing-with-formula/
Bed sharing and using the side-lying position are game-changers for most nursing mothers
Many women find direct breastfeeding at night allows them to get more sleep. Mastering the side-lying position tends to make night feeds much less exhausting: https://www.cordeliauys.co.uk/in-praise-of-the-sidelying-position
Lots of women struggle to produce milk when pumping
When a mother breastfeeds, feeling, seeing, and smelling her baby helps her release oxytocin, the hormone which makes the muscles around the milk producing cells inside her breasts contract and push the milk out. This process is known as the let-down reflex (or the milk ejection reflex). But when a mother expresses her milk, especially if she is doing so when away from her baby, it can be harder to get the milk flowing:
Expressing can put mums at risk of oversupply
If a woman is exclusively breastfeeding without doing any pumping, her baby programmes her breasts to make exactly the right amount of milk. It’s blissfully simple. Pumping can interfere with the delicate balance that happens when a mother and baby are perfectly in tune with each other. As well as putting a mother at risk of reduced milk supply, pumping can also put a mother at risk of the opposite, that’s to say creating more milk than her baby needs, which increases her chances of getting blocked ducts and mastitis. Oversupply can also make babies uncomfortable and fussy.
Bottle feeding can lead to breast rejection and nursing strikes
When babies are bottle-fed on a regular basis, they can start to refuse to suckle at the breast, because breastfeeding is harder work for a baby, and it takes longer for the milk to start to flow.
If a baby is having a fussy period, and a mother is solely breastfeeding, she has to find ways of managing, but if there is the option, it’s not uncommon for mothers to offer a bottle, which can lead to a baby refusing to breastfeed, and therefore being given more and more bottles.
I regularly hear from mothers whose babies have been given bottles and who then start to reject the breast occasionally or all the time. These mothers will then need to pump to protect their milk supply. In many cases this results in a breastfeeding journey ending sooner than the mother wanted.
Of course, pumping and bottle feeding can be incredibly useful…
I need to emphasise that I am not at all against pumping and giving bottles. I was a volunteer pump agent for a leading pump manufacturer for many years. I know pumping works well for many women and can allow mothers who need to go back to work earlier than 6 months, or who will regularly need to be away from their young babies for longer than 2 or 3 hours, to continue breastfeeding. If a baby is born premature, unwell or is unable to latch, or if a mother needs to stop breastfeeding temporarily, pumping with a hospital grade double pump can enable her to establish and maintain her milk supply. Pumping can also be very helpful if a mother needs to increase her milk supply.
When parents practise paced bottle feeding, it helps to protect against overfeeding and breast rejection:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGPm5SpLxXY
…However, it is possible to breastfeed without pumping or using bottles, and some women find this much easier and more enjoyable
I am keen to raise awareness of the fact that if a mother is lucky enough to be able to take at least 6 months maternity leave, it is very much possible to breastfeed without doing any pumping and without ever using bottles. What’s more, this can make her experience of breastfeeding easier, simpler and more enjoyable.
I suspect many people assume that all babies will need to be bottle fed at some point, but that really isn’t the case. From around 6 months, babies can drink water or milk out of a cup or beaker if their mother is not around.
It is also worth bearing in mind that the early introduction of a bottle is no guarantee that a baby will continue taking one. It is not uncommon for a baby to take a bottle early on, and then one day suddenly refuse to.
What mothers say about their experiences of breastfeeding without pumping
To find out why some women choose not to give any bottles, and to hear about their experiences, I posted the following question on NWL Breastfeeding, a Facebook group for London-based breastfeeding mothers:
“I’m writing an article about how it’s possible and feasible, if one is lucky enough not to need to go back to work earlier than 6 months, to breastfeed without ever using bottles. If that’s been your experience, I’d be grateful if you could post below about what it was like for you.”
Over 80 members responded, and I have compiled their comments below.
The idea that fathers need to bottle feed to bond with their babies can affect a mother’s breastfeeding journey & make her life stressful
Some mothers feel obliged to pump because their partner believes this is the only way he can bond with their baby. This can lead to a very miserable and stressful experience for the mother:
Anonymous: “My husband wanted to give our daughter a bottle in the evening, so he could bond better with her, which meant I couldn’t refuse. But I wished I didn’t have to do it, because I needed three or four pumping sessions to get him that one bottle of milk. It was so stressful for me, and I was always worried that I wouldn’t be able to get enough milk. I also had to pump while he was giving her the bottle, so half of my day was centred around that one bottle of milk.
I know it’s not the question that was asked but it’s another side of “giving a bottle”. The day I packed my pump for storage was the day I exhaled. Removing that pressure and focusing on our breastfeeding journey was such a relief! I was able to work from home so lots of times I would latch her in a sling or on a very carefully propped feeding pillow at my desk and she could feed while I did my calls and worked on my laptop. While I managed to create a little supply of frozen milk, we ended up disposing of it as we never used it. My daughter is still breastfeeding at 26 months…it has been such a blessing for us after such a rough start that we are enjoying it every day it lasts.”
There are many ways dads can bond with their babies that don’t involve feeding
Becky: “Breastfeeding is very special and my partner, her father, is very supportive and hands on. He has never voiced a desire to feed our baby. He has never felt ‘left out’ by not being able to feed her. They have a very wonderful bond and spend a huge amount of time together in other ways. He always tells people: ‘I do everything Becky does, except breastfeed.’”
Cameron: “Ellen is in charge of the input and I’m in charge of the output.”
Alex: “There’s a lot of guilt that gets placed on mothers to do certain things and one of those that irks me the most is “You should let dad feed the baby so he can bond properly”. What does that even mean!? And why can that bonding only happen during a feed? We play different roles in our girls’ lives and they are both special in different ways.”
Pumping is boring, exhausting, stressful and time consuming
Sophie: “I decided not to pump at all with my youngest having had a miserable time having to pump and bottle supplement with her big brother. I had no appetite to deal with the faff of it all again.”
Joanne: “With my second (now 7 months old) I’ve never bothered expressing as I realised that first time round it just caused me stress with no benefit!”
Flora: “I have been thinking a lot about this recently as I have never used bottles or expressed with my second baby - I just haven’t had the energy to even get my pump out and my baby had a dairy allergy so can’t give normal formula. I’ve enjoyed how simple things have been (no sterilising, no equipment).”
Alex: “I’ve never used bottles - I have an almost 3-year-old who still breastfeeds and also a 6-month-old. I think when our older daughter was born, we just assumed we would use bottles for some feeds as we thought that’s what everyone did! And that it might give more flexibility if my husband could help on the feeding front. So we bought a pump, storage bags, etc... But I never found the time nor had the inclination to express - the less on my to-do list the better I felt about my day!”
Becky: “I have personally not wanted to introduce a bottle because I have thought that the whole pumping and sterilising regime seems like such a faff and hard work. All mums I speak to seem to hate pumping.”
Cina: “With my first I tried bottles of expressed milk and she just wasn’t keen and it seemed like an extra faff and unnecessary stress seeing as I didn’t actually need to be away from her. Second time round I could not be bothered so just didn’t as there was no reason for us to be apart for a significant amount of time. I’m glad we didn’t as it took out the extra stress of trying to get her to take a bottle, that we just didn’t need!”
Dina: “I wanted to avoid the hassle of sterilising, pumping, worrying about how much my baby is getting and was worried about ‘nipple confusion’, ‘when I should pump’. I was particularly confused about needing to pump while baby has the bottle and how this would help me rest more while also keep up my supply, so that was a major factor in not bothering with bottles.
I managed to also avoid mastitis completely which was very lucky, but I think might have been down to always having baby be the one to remove milk.”
Maya: “My son didn't take a bottle and I'm so glad because pumping was so exhausting!”
Lucy: “With my first baby I had to go to a wedding when she was 4 months old to which she was not invited. Cue much stress, tears and worry about getting her to take a bottle…The upshot of all that was that I found the process of expressing, sterilising, trying to encourage a baby to take a bottle, then inevitably wasting half the milk stressful, full of faff and incredibly time consuming.”
Exclusive breastfeeding is simpler, easier and more convenient
Lucy: “With my second baby I just didn’t have time for that faff. I knew she would be with me all the time so I didn’t see the need to introduce a bottle and it was such a relief not to have to even think about it. She latched perfectly at 5 minutes old and we were away.”
Elle: “From a practical point of view, I love the freedom of having always what my baby needs without the need to remember to take a bottle, wash, sterilise, warm up, check the temperature… I just need to make sure I’m with her at least within 3 hours or so most of time. Also SO convenient when flying! To the question: any liquids? (especially when they see the baby) I always smile and say: no just mummy.”
Courtney: “With Teddy, we never used bottles and it was a completely different experience for us from our daughter, who was bottle fed from day three…I found that breastfeeding just simplified everything for me. Night feeding was easier because I didn’t have to get up and make a bottle, I could leave the house with very little (whereas I felt I was carrying a massive load of bottles/formula/sterilising tablets/water/etc with my daughter); overall I felt I could be more flexible. Breastfeeding was also the answer for everything, Teddy being overwhelmed/hurt/hungry/tired/angry/overexcited/sick. I felt that I was able to get more sleep and that had a huge impact on those early days and months. It was (and continues to be), the most important tool in my toolbox.”
Joanna: “I love the simplicity of it including feeding to sleep in a recovery position (both for bedtime and for naps) without having to move or reposition the baby plus of course the connection. I feel it is our time but in a way my time too – it’s a great opportunity to catch up on sleep/ rest / reflection/ reading / extra connection when I finally got back to work after 12 months etc.”
Laura: “It’s soooooo much easier. No sterilising, no pumping - if I’m very honest, laziness and searching for the easiest path (especially when taking care of a baby, sleepless nights etc) were definite factors for me.”
Suzanne: “I exclusively breastfed Henry without a bottle etc until he eventually started to take water additionally from an open top little cup at about 8 months old. We were travelling for over half of my maternity leave and it was so much easier to just feed him directly.”
Maggie: “My plan with my second was to try and introduce a bottle earlier as an option, but then you know, there was COVID, so we weren’t going anywhere anyways! As others have said, once you make that decision it takes the stress out of the situation.”
It is possible to be productive while breastfeeding
Kirsti: “I love to read while feeding (a Kindle is easier than an actual book), listen to a podcast, or call a friend, and I’ve even written blog posts and brainstormed work ideas on my phone. That way I find I’m grateful for the time because it’s either productive or a form of self-care.”
Young babies can be taken almost everywhere
Lots of women believe that they will need to pump so they can leave their baby with a carer if they need to go out, but in fact, it’s possible to take a young baby almost anywhere. Having them in a sling or baby carrier tends to help. An architect friend of mine took her young baby to all her meetings with English Heritage and she says no one batted an eyelid when she breastfed him. I took my youngest son to a talk by the author Amanda Foreman when he was just a few months old. Under the Equality Act 2010, it is illegal to prevent a woman from breastfeeding her child (of any age) wherever she is legally allowed to be.
Sophie: “She went to the hairdressers with me, to leg wax appointments (fed during both!), KIT days, weddings, funerals and all sorts.”
Becky: “I’ve not had any occasions I’ve needed to go to where my baby couldn’t come along with the support of her dad helping out. As she has grown, and time in between feeds lengthened, I’ve also had time to myself. Introducing a bottle has just not ever seemed necessary.”
Gwyneth: “I have found it easier than I thought to just take my baby with me everywhere I go.”
Varsha: “Baby just goes with me everywhere now and she gets milk when she wants it.”
Joanne: “I tried to offer my first baby a bottle for a while but he never took it so I gave up as I got so sick of throwing out my expressed milk! After a while I realised I had no need to be away from him for long enough that he would need a bottle anyway! I still went to the hairdresser (my husband would bring baby midway through for a feed).”
Kirsti: “Recently I attended a mum & baby yoga class where I could take my baby. Mums just fed and soothed their babies freely in the class when necessary (we still got a decent amount of exercise done!), and it was a great way to make new mum friends. I feel so happy knowing that I can consistently attend yoga now and won’t have that background tension of wanting my me time but feeling anxious about being needed!
Another part of it I think is about getting more comfortable breastfeeding in public or having the baby cry while out. One thing I really enjoyed pre-baby was attending author events, and now that they’re open again post-covid I’ve been frustrated that I can’t go… but perhaps it’s not so much that I “can’t” go as that I’m anxious she cries in that situation or feeding doesn’t go as well as it does at home. I suppose if I turn up early and begin feeding her in the sling just before the event starts, she’ll probably fall asleep for the rest of it and I can still enjoy the talk — and if I sit at the back, I can quickly slip out if she cries. I think the more I practice bringing my baby with me to the things I want to do, the more confident I’ll become.”
Consuela: “It means I can leave the house very quickly - so long as baby is in the sling, her food and drink is on tap. Friends have commented that they’re up for meeting up a lot as I can get out and there aren’t loads of baby related delays! Also means I can get on with all sorts, be it enjoying a lunch out or just sorting out more mundane things like laundry or ordering shopping.”
Alexandra: “I never felt the need to be out without my baby and tended to just take him everywhere with me.”
The time babies are tiny and need to be fed really frequently doesn’t last that long
Elle: “I only tried the bottle twice just to see if it could work and neither of us seemed really excited about it. I didn’t enjoy expressing and she didn’t enjoy the bottle. It’s a tough journey at times due to the need for mom to always be around, but I accepted that, knowing it’s for a relative short time. I personally enjoy this moment so much!”
Gery: “Yes, there wasn’t the option to be away for more than a couple of hours when the girls were very little, but those first few months fly by so quickly and I wouldn’t change a thing.”
Cogs: “With my first I did my socialising in the day, managed to fit in gym, walks, lunches out etc and knew one day I’d get back to going to the pub in the evening and out for dinner.”
Some mothers don’t want to spend time away from their young babies
Emma: “My first had maybe two or three bottles of expressed milk ever, my second maybe one which he didn’t take and my third is currently 11 months and yet to meet a bottle. I’ve been lucky enough to be able to keep working from home flexibly with the kids around and have never really wanted to be away from them so haven’t really expressed. I’m also rubbish at expressing despite a great milk supply, so it just seems like such an effort that I’ve not really bothered!”
Cogs: “People were desperate to get me using a bottle [with my first baby] “just in case”! And so I could go out in the evening. But I didn’t want to go out in the evening because I knew even if we went through the rigmarole of getting him to accept a bottle, he wouldn’t be happy without me there. It wasn’t just about the boob - it was about our relationship.
With my second…I’m all the surer that I won’t introduce a bottle or pump because I really do know how short these years are now. I had an inkling that they would be and really did try to cherish every feed and every moment with my firstborn, but now with additional hindsight I absolutely know that the days and weeks fly by, and my baby girl will never be this little again. I don’t want to be separated from her.”
Kylie: “My baby has never taken a bottle and I will be going back to work part time in a few months when he will be 9 1/2 months old. We are currently experimenting with a Doidy cup. Until now, I haven’t been away from him for more than an hour. I feel breastfeeding is an excellent excuse/reason to stay super close and I am so grateful to have had this uninterrupted time with him.”
Amelia: “I am lucky that I have a year of maternity leave and no need to be apart from her and if I want to do anything I just take her with me.”
Older babies can go longer between feeds and cope with solids and water, or milk, from a cup
Older babies are also much more predictable, so it’s easier to plan around their schedule.
Jessica: “My son has never drunk from a bottle and very happily started to use a cup easily [now he has started solids].”
Sophie: “When she was older, I could intuit her feeding patterns a bit more so I’d know if I needed to go somewhere how long she could go without feeding eg physio appointments etc.”
Varsha: “My little one is just over a year and has never taken a bottle, even when I was admitted to hospital as an emergency, and she couldn’t breastfeed for >24 hours. I can only say that she found her way with having food and water from dad and then when she saw me, attached herself.”
Joanne: “After about 8 months he was taking water from a cup and eating lots of food, so his dad just gave him food and water while I was gone, and I was able to go to drinks with friends.”
Maya: “My son wouldn’t take a bottle. At around 5 months, it got much easier to leave him for an hour or so as he was very happy exploring the world and also got better at sleeping a bit longer. Then when he was ready for solids at 6 months, it got even easier and now at 11 months, he's settling into nursery and with grandparents.”
Alexandra: “I exclusively breastfed my son until introducing solids at around 8 months and am still nursing him now at 2.5 years old. We tried a couple of times to introduce a bottle of expressed milk, but he would never take it - looking back I shouldn't have bothered, I think "getting him to take a bottle" was more about the expectations of others. I never felt the need to be out without my baby and tended to just take him everywhere with me. I went back to work at 10 months. I expressed for a short time so he could have my milk in a sippy cup, but he wasn’t too interested in that either, and was happy to wait until pickup for a breastfeed! I am glad at how it all worked out and proud of our breastfeeding journey.”
Kim: “I have had two children and have been in the incredibly fortunate position of never needing to use bottles for either. With my oldest, she was offered breastmilk in a doidy cup by my husband at 7 months when I was out and she happily took it.”
Julia: “My son never used a bottle and I went back to work when he was 9 months old. It’s mainly because expressing and sterilising is such a pain! I was lucky he took to solids well.”
In an emergency, babies can be fed with a syringe
Gwyneth: “I’ve pumped a bit for the freezer and in an emergency my husband could syringe feed if I was in A & E or something, but otherwise we’ll just wait until he can use a cup.”
Trying to get a baby to take a bottle can be very stressful!
Reena: “My older son refused a bottle from about 10 days old even though the midwife gave him a bottle on day 4. It was quite stressful trying to express and offer feeds because he *must* drink from a bottle. I didn't even try with second son, and he breastfed until he was 4 years old.”
Older babies can ‘reverse cycle’ and get the breastmilk they need when they’re reunited with their mother
Kathryn: “My babies number 3 and 4 never had a bottle despite my going back to work at 6 months both times.
Baby 3 refused any expressed milk from any vessel. My child minder tried them all. Eventually she made mash potato with it so it wasn't wasted. Baby 3 very quickly got good at eating and would drink some water form a sippy cup. When I picked him up he had a big old cluster feeding session to make up for it. Then a bedtime feed, night feeds and a morning feed. On our days together we breastfed as normal and he went back to be pretty much exclusively breastfed with just a little food, as you would expect from a 6 month old baby! After a couple of weeks I decided I wasn’t going to express for mash potato, so I stopped. I sometimes needed to hand express a little for comfort. But my boobs soon adjusted. They absolutely knew which day of the week it was.
Baby no 4 was not quite as extreme. He would have a small cup of expressed milk. But only 30-60ml and then the rest of the time had food and water. So I expressed a bit longer for him. Both children we breastfed for over 3 years.”
External pressure to express and give bottles
I remember a new mother calling me several years ago to ask about how to manage pumping and bottle feeding. During the conversation it became apparent that she didn’t want to spend time away from her baby, but friends and relatives had been trying to encourage her to ‘get her life back’ and she felt ashamed and embarrassed about not wanting to be separated from her baby. She felt as if she were somehow being ‘weak’. If a mother is keen to have some time to herself, that should, of course, be respected. But mothers who would rather not spend time away from their baby should also be respected and not put under pressure.
Joanne: “Looking back, I think I only became interested in the idea of baby being able to take bottles because I felt pressure from my mother-in-law, as well as friends who were doing it!”
Gwyneth: “It’s not ‘resigning’ to just exclusively nurse at this stage, probably society puts a lot of pressure on us to use bottles or sees bottles as the norm. I was getting pressure from my MIL to introduce a bottle as SHE found it irritating that my husband wouldn’t take one as a baby, but that was her experience, not mine.”
Courtney: “Unfortunately, there was pressure from every angle that I should offer a bottle now and then, to give myself a break or give others a chance to feed. But I very quickly realised that it said more about those applying the pressure than me, so I ignored it and eventually the comments stopped.”
Laura: “I think friends felt pressure to pump even when it wasn’t necessary. There is so much talk…about which pump, what bottles, it makes it at the fore of your mind before the baby arrives (if I want to ebf, I must pump…).”
Maggie: “With my first I think I felt under some pressure after a few months that he should take a bottle of expressed milk (1) for top ups as there was concern on weight gain (2) because of this message that seemed to be coming from some family, and that seemed to be generally out there in society, that I needed to make sure he could also take the bottle so he ‘wasn’t totally dependent on me’ and others could feed him/I could leave him with others. It then became quite stressful when he wouldn’t take a bottle no matter what we tried. I was told as I hadn’t introduced a bottle early enough I had missed ‘that window’! I felt then I had almost done something wrong.”
Worry about breast rejection
Gwyneth: “I’ve got a 12 week-old who won’t take a bottle, which I’m actually relieved about as I was worried about breast rejection. I will just wait until the weaning stage for him to use a cup. I’m lucky to take so much time off work and it’s just easier and less stressful to take him places.”
Amelia: “I am so weary of bottles and eventual breast rejection from my first. I therefore have completely avoided introducing a bottle at all to my second. I've actually found it far easier than the feeding, pumping and top up regime I went through with my first.”
Some women do feel trapped, or overwhelmed, but find it gets easier as their baby gets older
Emma: “I felt trapped at times when my first born would not take a bottle - I dreamed of having an hour to go to a yoga class without worrying about filling him with milk beforehand and then worrying during the class that he would be hungry whilst I wasn’t there! I found that around 5 months it got a lot easier to leave my son for longer than an hour. He fed a little less often, he decided that feeding during the day was boring and he’d rather look around - my husband could distract him if I wasn’t there by taking him for a walk outside or putting him forward-facing in a sling, and then shortly afterwards he started solids. Second time around I have twins who have just turned 5 months. I’m not pumping at all as I don’t have time. I can feed one before I go, take my eldest and the other twin out for 2.5 hours whilst my husband looks after the other.”
Melissa: “I think the prospect of only being able to feed her myself was quite overwhelming when it dawned on me that she wasn't going to take a bottle - but now it seems like the easiest option really, in contrast to a daily bottle battle and chucking away all that precious milk. The time is certainly flying, and I can definitely feel the breastfeeding becoming much easier than it was - think I will just try and enjoy the ride of the next couple of months until she can try a cup. Goodness me, I can't imagine how it will feel not to have her with me all the time!”
Helen: “My son rejected bottle at 10 weeks and I tried literally every day, every kind of bottle, every technique to get him to take it. I was desperate as I did need the space to be able to leave him with someone and have a break for my mental health. I’d say at 6 months it gets less essential as they can have water from a sippy cup and food and you know they aren’t going to starve.”
Pumping can bring back the trauma of a previous experience
Amelia: “With my second daughter who is 10 weeks old I have managed to exclusively breastfeed and she's gaining weight well and she's never even seen a bottle. It’s been such a healing experience for me and i would not want to be apart from her anyway. I did get my pump out once and using it brought back many memories of feeding troubles from my first and it was not an enjoyable experience at all.”
Suzanne: “I had exclusively pumped for my first son and had found that quite emotionally hard towards the end and so I was also reluctant to pump until I returned to work this time, so I put it off as long as possible!”
In conclusion
If you are lucky enough not to need to spend much time away from your baby for at least the first 6 months of their life, and breastfeeding is going well, you might want to wait and see how things go before doing any pumping, because not pumping might make your breastfeeding journey considerably easier and more relaxing. Your baby will programme your breasts to make exactly the right amount of milk for his or her needs; you are less likely to get blocked ducts and mastitis, and much less likely to have a baby who starts to reject the breast or goes on a nursing strike. Six months is a relatively short period, and before you know it, your baby will be able to cope without your presence for quite long stretches.